I'm two months out of a major life decision that has both ruined and saved me depending on your perspective. I know how I'll be viewed for the rest of my life through the eyes of the people who have yet to experience grace, love and forgiveness and I'm afraid of that. I'm afraid of judgement and what's being said of me. I'm afraid of this tiny island and the connections we all have here. I'm afraid of how fast news travels and the gossip and lies people will choose to believe.
Yet I will choose to believe the truth. This truth: I am not defined by my faults and mistakes.
I stand by my decision for the sake of my mental health and well-being. I believe love is something worth fighting for and mistakes are forgiven as soon as they're confessed to my Father. People who truly love and care for me will love my happiness just as much as they hate my sin. Despite my feelings of loneliness and anxiety, I have a God who provides and takes care of me better than I could do for myself.
The reinvention process begins with a clean slate. I have no job, no car, and very minimal solid relationships. But I've got a full heart and more courage to step out creatively than I've ever had. I don't know where I'm going in life, but who even does?